It’s been a while since I’d done an Office Politics post. But I’m returning to a favourite topic.

Here’s the thing: work environments are hard enough as it is. You’re trying to get stuff done, you’re stressed about deadlines, you’re trying to live your actual life before 8 and after 5 and on weekends (after the grocery shopping and the occasional annoyance of car licences and doctor appointments, etc). In addition to this, you have to deal with work colleagues every day – some of whom you may like, most of whom you just have to tolerate because the team wasn’t designed with your happiness in mind.

This is breeding ground for discontent. Discontent breeds malcontents. And malcontents become the viperous – making everything worse for everyone.

So I went onto the internet, and found this article says that there are 7 kinds of bitches in Australia*:
*the article actually says that there are 8, but the eighth turned out to be the Not-A-Bitch who is trying to do her job and sometimes gets a bit grumpy.

• The Excluder – who doesn’t even realise that you exist unless there’s something in it for them. This is the kind of person that forgets to tell you about a key client meeting, and then steals your thunder while you’re not there.
• The Insecure – micromanages, does all the work because she doesn’t trust anyone, complains bitterly about having to do all the work. Feels vastly overworked and drastically underpaid, owing to having done all of the work. Expresses resentment by treating everyone as generally sub-human.
• The Toxic AKA The Destructive Bitch – everything they do is a sweet and concerned stab in the back. Every request is a put-down. Every compliment is designed to tarnish someone else*. When you annoy them, you expose the sharp iced edges that leave you feeling like you just lived through the Exorcist.
  *Example: “Hi Jane and Laura. Jane – don’t you look so lovely today! Laura – I hope you remembered that presentation later? Please don’t forget this time.”
• The Narcissist AKA The Queen B – always takes the attention.
• The Screamer – intimidates everyone by throwing hissy fits.
• The Liar – twists and manipulates everything that you say. And not always for their advantage – sometimes, just because it’s fun to create a little discord and watch a little smackdown.
• The Incompetent – may not be good at her job, but is very good at presenting your work as hers.

The Trouble with Bitches

This is my observation:

• Some people are problems because that’s just who they are.
• But all you need is one bad apple.

Here is an example:

1. Let’s say that one member of the team is one of those venal Insecure types.
2. They’re busy micromanaging and complaining and treating people badly.
3. This obviously causes some resentment in the team.
4. But most people just learn to deal with them.
5. But not everyone.
6. In particular, from what I’ve seen, the Insecure team member tends to take a particular opposite-of-shining to someone that they work with regularly.
7. This translates into one person taking the brunt of the complaint.
8. When you are complained about constantly, you are also constantly being undermined – especially if the Insecure person has worked themselves into a position of some authority (which is usually the case – the Insecure are remarkably important in any team – they get stuff done, thereby making themselves indispensable).
9. The person being undermined is almost forced to become Toxic in response.
10. It’s a question of self-preservation. If you’re being undermined – then you have to correct that perception. The long road is to stand up for yourself firmly but politely. The short cut is to underhandedly suck away at the Insecure person’s credibility by making sure that their every mistake and shortcoming is obvious and slightly exaggerated.
11. Once someone decides to step down the Toxic route of game play, you get a rapid descension into the dirty kind of Office Politics.
12. The kind where innocent people get fired because they’re caught in the crossfire. Where cultures are poisonous. Where you have to appear to be working because if you’re not seen to be working then that just becomes another piece of ammunition in the arsenal for anyone that needs it.

So let me allocate the appropriate blame here.

It really is the Boss’ fault.

In order for this type of behaviour to be going on, it needs to be rewarded. And it gets rewarded through promotion and pay rises and not stepping up to the plate and telling these workplace bitches to stop it or they’re out.

It also gets rewarded by going unnoticed – which I just can’t believe is possible. After all, when you’re at the top, you have a topside view of all the motivations. You’re privy to the salary discussions and the job path conversations and the performance reviews – you have the best insight into all the goings-on and the why. It is your role to step in and take the toy away from the naughty person. Slap on the wrist. Send them to the naughty corner. Expel when it’s clear that they’re causing more harm than good.

Anyway. Waiting for that to happen is not always appropriate.

So in the interim, I found another article in Psychology Today, written by Meredith Fuller (author of Working With Bitches).

It may be more helpful:

If your manager is a destructive bitch…

Never be alone with her for important exchanges. She will lie in the form of ‘not remembering’ what you remember about what was decided.

Transparency is your weapon because secrecy is hers. If you find yourself shafted by her in a meeting, say sweetly in front of colleagues, “I am really confused that you said that, because I thought we had agreed that this and this was happening. Can you help me understand what has happened here? 

Counter her attempts to undermine by dividing and conquering and working individuals very hard, by talking to colleagues and finding support. Don’t allow yourself to be isolated by self-doubt.

Be protective of your privacy. Make sure not to leave your work screen open because she will look over your shoulder and her eyes will ‘vacuum’ your desk.

Stay calm. Many staffers who must answer to destructive managers tolerate ill treatment for months and then explode over something minor. She will turn this into evidence of your emotional instability.

Protect yourself with records. Write confirming emails after verbal exchanges and cc others; always print out and keep hard copies of communications.

Don’t let them win.

Happy weekend.

Rolling Alpha posts opinions on finance, economics, and the corporate life in general. Follow me on Twitter @RollingAlpha, and on Facebook at www.facebook.com/rollingalpha.